Happy Spirit

The sunshine of true bliss finds its home in the happiness of simple joys... In the dew of little things the heart finds its rapturous morning... The warmth of frivolous felicity finds its colour in the rainbow of free spirit... In the skies of gleeful hues the freedom finds its ultimate solace..

Ride of Life...

Life is an adventurous ride and I am sure that we can fill that blank with many words. There were some moments in life when I felt that, there cannot be anything more worse than this. Like feeling very low about something and thinking that I have seen it all…But now I wonder, Did I? Perhaps no. It’s just that I haven’t seen something like that happen to me..or I have never imagined it would be me. But, there are people who are victims of misfortune in every walk of life or have seen more miserable things that life has thrown their way…and it’s only when you hear their stories you begin to realize how fortunate you are to have what you have….It’s important to stop complaining and start living…May be this ride is only as happy as you can make it and enjoying every moment with contentment is the key to that happiness. Definitely there are hard winds of sorrow but without contented happiness  there is always a deep abyss that nothing can fill.

I have read some where that “Life is what happens to you while you are busy planning other things” and it’s so true…We are so busy running with our lives that we often forget that this moment is lost forever…either you live it or lose it….

Aam Panna

The 90's (aam panna)
If you have seen the ad of paper boat’s aam panna, you know exactly what I am thinking…When ever I think of my childhood there are some
wonderful memories that come to my mind…especially those days during the 90’s era…when music was still only available on cassettes and radio,
movies were family events and multiplex was never heard of, when road side samosa, mirchi was our favorite snack available for 2rs 50p, when
leg touch and current shock were break time sports. I remember sneaking fata-fat in uniform pockets and eating them during the class, asking my
grand father for a cup of ice cream after final exams, saving 25p and 50p to make 5rs and finally buy a dairy milk, making paper boats
and setting them for sail in the rain,waiting for the month of june to buy new books, labels and pens, waiting an entire week for sunday to
finally watch duck tales, tales pin and alice in wonderland…My very fond memories of 90’s.

Today we have more electronic gadgets than the number of people in the house, music is available every where (thanks to digital clouds of data)
movies…don’t even get me started…everyday more than 2 movies in over 150 channels in at least 3 languages….that’s just too little for entertainment.we also
have unimaginable number of websites hosting all the movies, music and non-sense…Samosa is exorbitantly priced at 10rs and 100rs almost has lost it’s value.
Children only are seen playing Tennis and Cricket. Chocolates and Ice creams are must haves….video games and iPods are common….Plethora of
channels dedicated for cartoons and remotes at their service. More or less the generation is caught in a digital wave…
I do not hate technology and I love having all the comforts we have today. But, today I still cherish sitting with my grand father and enjoying those 12rs cups of vanilla ice cream,
sneaking with my brother and sharing the 5rs dairy milk, sitting before the TV and watching mowgli.
This is something that I can never promise my child…the something that will always be part of my life….

A GIRL IN THE RAIN...

There she was standing alone...enchanted and overwhelmed. there was smile on her lips and happiness in her eyes. She held the droplets delicately in her dainty hands waiting to be drenched. She was lost in her own world. It was a scene of frivolous delight, of a soul dancing in the joy of fervent rain. It was her moment of simple bliss. A timeless magic of nature and it's beauty. A Girl in the rain...

Samayama Kadalake

hrudayame alalai egase kanuvindagu veduka
kanureppala kaburulatoh daricherina korika
pulinkatala vintala sandadi vela
samayama kadalake

hariville varnalai merise jilibili taaraka
chirujallulaa tadipi kadige andala kaanuka
kavvintala allari saage vela
samayama kadalake

merupule karigi kalamai gisina chitrama
manasune tadimi darike cherina mounama
naa talapula adugulu urike vela
samayama kadalake

vennele varamai bhuvine vaalina punnama
kaluvale kalisi kalipina vayyari rupuma
naa oohalu parugulu teese vela
samayama kadalake

My Style

This post is my expression of style for the ‘A Style Of My Own’ blogger contest by Women’s Web and Trishla emart

Style is a blend of fashion and attitude. I think a sense of fashion combined with a touch of attitude that is slightly personalised becomes our style. I observe changes in ethnic wear, dream of new hairstyles, indulge in window shopping, stare at jewellery hoardings, look online for best deals , keep up with new trends and finally get ready for shopping every season. All these ingredients enhance the taste of style. And finally to me ’Shopping’ is the most important companion of style because to know what to buy and where to buy is as important as knowing the trend itself.

My simple rule of style is ‘Everything matters’. Right from clothes to shoes, bags to stoles, hair to gloss; everything matters. Be it the color of the outfit, the shade of the lipstick or the tone of the hair color , all of it has to fit and when it does not; a pinch of attitude and smile will always do the magic.

However, I am really not a fashionista, all I care about end of the day is just to create my own sense of style no matter what I wear; be it a saree or jeans, kurta or skirt. I once used to go shopping for fun ,spend as much as I like on my accessories. My wardrobe was then different from what it is today. Now, I am no longer a college kid or an unmarried career woman or a working wife but rather a full time homemaker and an all time mother. So I shifted gears, now my fashion is in my comfortable cotton clothes and nothing else. My simple gold jewellery replaced my big flashing earrings and bold bangles. A simple homely black bindi replaced my dainty shining bindis, a small lip guard replaced my glosses and lipsticks.My huge collection of colorful bindis is closely stacked in a small bag and my big box of nail colors  and eye shadows is safely packed and locked away in my closet. So are my bangles, bracelets and watches. My bags and best clothes keep staring at me from the hanger unless I am getting ready to go to a party. That’s it.

I once used to wear my kurtis paired with matching earrings, my jeans paired with sleeveless tops. watch was always my accessory and so was my leather wallet and mobile. Style was buying clothes and refreshing the wardrobe. Style was simply everything money can buy and all that  I can carry. These days, I dress in cottons at home and wear my anarkali suits for parties. Sarees are always set aside for weddings and temples. Clothes are hugely a matter of comfort more than anything else. But, I never neglect to match these with my favorite earrings, elegant flats, colorful rubber bands and hairclips, nice nail color and gloss. No matter what I wear , I never forget my kajal or eyeliner. All these things together define my style be it just a very normal day or a very special occasion.  

I once had plenty of time to spend but now my time is a precious commodity that I have to wisely manage and choose what to invest in. So I revised my sense of style with changing roles. It doesn’t mean I gave up on my looks. I still keep an eye out for changing trends and never stop shopping for big long earrings and accessories. My collection keeps growing with time and my wardrobe always has something new. End of it, all that matters to me is the beautiful smile that I always try to carry and the touch of attitude that I try not to lose. This is my style, the style personalized to fit my way of life; an attribute of my ever evolving persona.

Rangula vedika

Bangaru jilugula prabhaasa veena

swaralu palike ravikirana vaana

velige sobhala sandhya raagam

kantulu jimme karteeka deepam

nindu vennela yamini teeram

chikati vaakita merise varnam

pallavinche andala aakasa geetika

ramaniya chitrala rangula vedika

Transition from being a career woman to being a SHM (Stay Home Mother)

The Transition (Career woman to a Stay Home Mom)

This is an emotional account of my journey of motherhood in which change is my constant companion.

Everybody’s journey of motherhood is different. Its an encounter of personal preferences, choices and life events. An encounter that is always new and evolving. The transition from being a career woman to becoming a stay home mother is one such preference and choice that is never easy. We are constantly questioning, changing and adjusting along this journey. 

When it comes to motherhood there are two modes of thought. One being a stay home mom and two being a working mom. But, there is a third mode; the transition mode. Shifting from being a career woman to being a full time mother. It sounds like it’s the same as being a stay home mother but then if you made that choice you know what it is. There is often that dissatisfaction and insufficiency that nobody can help you answer. 

When I quit my job and chose to stay home with my child, I thought I was just making a simple choice. A choice that will make me devote myself completely to being a full time mother. But, soon it dawned on me that I gave up my career in the process. Initially it sounded to me in my head as just a break. But, then soon I saw people who started with me moving ahead in their careers. I thought I shifted gears and slowed down a bit but instead my engine broke down some where along the road and some how I was struck at that same place in life. My career became a thing of past. I had trouble digesting the fact that I was just a homemaker taking care of my child. It became excruciating with time. It felt like I was the only person standing alone on that road in screaming silence trying to fill the deep void that nothing can fulfill.

Yes, people tell you its worth it. But, you know that more than anything in the world. Because, no one needs to remind you of the fact that being a mother is awesome. But, It’s not about how worthy the choice is but rather the question of how many times you can answer your screaming silence. Its not about how much you love your child but how much you can give up. The satisfaction that comes from taking care of your child and that which comes from being a working woman enjoying your social space and financial independence are completely different. When you make that choice you know that its worth it, but then you are giving up something that defines you for yourself; not to the world but to you. It is hard to explain this; you can only experience it.

Being a mother is like trying to master the art of multitasking. It’s not easy but its the only way you can get things done. In this process you are always learning. after all, it’s a role you have to step up to and everything is new. When your child is crying you should know why and if she is not is eating you should know why and people expect you to know it; just because you are the mother. Often these people are women. Women who forget that they were once the mothers that we are today. Some how the mother has to have the magic wand that will make troubles go away. we are not magicians; we are human after all. we learn from experience too. Learning by failing is the best way to learn but no one gives you that time. They are all ready with stories and self experiences from the book of their lives to tell you how to feed, take care and raise your child. It’s like an annoying TV ad, that keeps coming often; only you can’t change the channel. It is not just my story but the story of every woman who is learning, doing, failing but still learning because she always wants to be her best at being a mother. 

You feel helpless but unfortunately no one can understand you. One day you may kick start your engine and may begin working again and you know you will but that doesn’t help you overcome what you are dealing with today.Seeing your child smile is the only incentive that will make you sustain. Because, this may be an obvious choice but definitely a tough one that needs constant approval; not from the world but from you. 

This is not a story of diffidence or lack of confidence but rather an emotional dialogue that keeps going on in my head. No one likes to admit it or speak out loud about it. Who cares what others think!! they always either sympathize with you or judge you. So I decided to voice it.